English rugby, after the high of Paris, sunk to a fresh low on Saturday with Scotland ending their Six Nations chances by beating the auld enemy 15-9 in Edinburgh.
In a terrible game, the Scots simply kept their heads and plugged away as England, and Jonny Wilkinson in particular, gifted Scotland far too much easy possession and only once threatened the Scottish line. In the end it came down to discipline and mental strength, and Scotland were, by and large, far superior in that department.
Both sides went into this one proclaiming that it didn't matter how they got the win, as long as they got it. How true that proved to be. The weather also didn't care, showering the players with sheet after sheet and blowing the sheets for good measure. As a result, England rarely had any third phase possession, an error or a kick inevitably punctuating phases one and two. Scotland rarely had any territorial gain, with a blinkered runner or a kick punctuating what ball came their way. Anyone suffering insomnia should be prescribed a good dose of this game.
Jonny Wilkinson did, in the end, surpass Neil Jenkins as the world's top points-scorer in Test rugby, but it was a day he will want to forget. That one record-breaking kick aside, Wilkinson's boot was used to gift possession away. Kick after aimless kick fell upon the solid Hugo Southwell like the rain that fell on Edinburgh. It was, by quite a way, Wilkinson's worst performance in the white shirt. Danny Cipriani anyone? Oh, that's right, he wasn't there...
England's woes are generally deeper though, and the finger of accusation will point with unerring straightness at Briann Ashton. Was it upset in harmony in the camp that caused England to look so uninterested? It isn't as if they would normally be deterred by a cold wet day. Given the manner in which they put pay to France, you would have thought England's confident pack would have eaten the Scots like so many porridge oats. But they all trotted around the field, hitting the tackles, rucks and mauls but never really clearing them. A tactic or game-plan was never apparent. One step forward two weeks ago, two steps back this time. Why? Time for someone at the RFU to answer that one.
Anything to say about Scotland? Not much. They took their chances and defended excellently, not least when the English pack drove at their line for five minutes in the first half immediately after Rory Lamont had been taken from the field with a serious-looking head injury. That was England's one real threatening moment in the whole game. Scotland never got to the English line once, but then with a stream of needless penalties coming their way, they didn't need to. The win certainly won't blunt the knives being quietly sharpened for Frank Hadden, but at least his players scrapped and fought for the cause.
Scotland took an early lead as a result of the third penalty in a row conceded at a Scots line-out by England's pack after nine minutes. Then finally, after a quarter of utter torpor, England got a couple of penalties near the Scots line. Wilkinson kicked for the corner, as is England's frequent wont, but fully four minutes of driving later all the English pack had gained was a scrum in the middle of the field. Euan Murray slipped his binding at the scrum, and Wilkinson broke the record to equalise at 3-3.
But discipline was missing. Andy Sheridan was fortunate not to connect with Nathan Hines's face more sharply with his elbow, and even more so being as he had been the man with hands in the ruck that had given Paterson the chance to give Scotland back the lead.
On the half-time whistle, Paterson landed another to make it 9-3, with more hands being spied by referee Kaplan in the ruck.
It got worse after the break. Right from the off, Simon Shaw was caught coming in at the side and Paterson made it 12-3. Seven minutes and one unidentified pair of hands in the ruck later it was 15-3, Dan Parks this time doing the damage from distance.
Within five minutes it was 15-9, Wilkinson kicking two goals of his own as Scotland eased off the pressure slightly, and conceded one penalty for offside and one for going over the top.
Then the rot truly set in. Kick after kick boomed down the field, with no semblance of tactic from either side. The kicks were not even quality touch-finders or hanging up-and-unders. They were just the actions of bored people who didn't want to play.
Eventually England swung it wide on 65 minutes to Paul Sackey, who never once slipped away from anyone. England built up a head of steam with some better picks and drives. Then they turned it over.
With four minutes to go, Jason White put in a hit on Sackey that drove the winger some eight metres back, with a verve and passion that English players never once looked like showing.
With one minute, one minute to go, Charlie Hodgson, presumably on for Wilkinson in order to add some spice and lift to the dough, received the ball from a ruck and kicked it fully 50 metres down field. One minute to go, his team six behind, and he did that. What on earth goes on behind England's scenes? Scotland got the ball, and never gave it back to England again. England didn't deserve it.
Man of the match: In a match ruined by so much kicking, at least Hugo Southwell caught the ball well, ran it well, and kicked constructively for his team. His entire team gathers a group award for its defensive effort as well.
Moment of the match: Not a single one.
Villain of the match: None of these either. Even the niggle was passionless.
The scorers:
For Scotland:
Pens: Paterson 4, Parks
For England:
Pens: Wilkinson 3
Scotland: 15 Hugo Southwell, 14 Rory Lamont, 13 Simon Webster, 12 Graeme Morrison, 11 Nikki Walker, 10 Chris Paterson, 9 Mike Blair (c), 8 Simon Taylor, 7 Allister Hogg, 6 Alasdair Strokosch, 5 Scott MacLeod, 4 Nathan Hines, 3 Euan Murray, 2 Ross Ford, 1 Allan Jacobsen.
Replacements: 16 Fergus Thomson, 17 Alasdair Dickinson, 18 Craig Smith, 19 Jason White, 20 Kelly Brown, 21 Rory Lawson, 22 Dan Parks.
England: 15 Iain Balshaw, 14 Paul Sackey, 13 Jamie Noon, 12 Toby Flood, 11 Lesley Vainikolo, 10 Jonny Wilkinson, 9 Richard Wigglesworth, 8 Nick Easter, 7 Michael Lipman, 6 Tom Croft, 5 Steve Borthwick, 4 Simon Shaw, 3 Phil Vickery (c), 2 Lee Mears, 1 Andrew Sheridan.
Replacements: 16 George Chuter, 17 Matt Stevens, 18 Ben Kay, 18 Luke Narraway, 20 Paul Hodgson, 21 Mathew Tait, 22 Charlie Hodgson.
Referee: Jonathan Kaplan (South Africa)
Touch-judges: Marius Jonker (South Africa), Carlo Damasco (Italy)
Television match official: Tim Hayes (Wales)
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